Origin Story / Who is Illuma?

I am a multidisciplinary artist based in Austin, TX, who began a deep healing journey in 2022 after my mom passed away unexpectedly. This event freed me from a generational cycle that she herself was stuck in, and thrust me into a very necessary healing period as I decided "ENOUGH, I will never go through this again- I DESERVE BETTER!!". If you know anything about breaking generational cycles... you'll know that THAT determination ended up turning into more like a dark night of the soul (frikkin OW, but totally worth it).

During this journey, I intuitively leaned into my art to heal and keep my idle hands busy. One of the skills I perform with, called Flow Arts (dance, hula hooping, silk fans, dragon flow, and others), is incredibly healing for the nervous system. At the time, I thought nothing of it—I just knew it felt right and was better than bed rotting; but deciding to livestream in order to have a schedule and some sort of pressure to get up and make art, along with leaning into flow arts, was one of many things that absolutely saved my life.

Every time you lock into a flow state your brain and body learn to relax a little more, allowing you to slowly but surely pull yourself out of fight or flight. Apparently, I had been stuck in that state for most of my life due to unaddressed trauma—trauma that our society teaches us to just get over instead of working through. It was a strange experience embodying the duality of being such a happy, colorful person who was focused on dancing, wiggling, lifting others up, DJing, etc., while also going through the absolute darkest time of my life behind closed doors.

It didn’t make much sense to many people, but my nervous system absolutely wasn’t prepared to be around others and get asked the dreaded “How are you?” or “What have you been up to?”. I knew without a doubt that I would just burst into tears so I decided to heal before reintegrating. So, I focused on my stream and my healing within the safety of my home (which didn't entirely protect me, but that's a story for another day). It was the best thing I could have done for myself as I unearthed & processed years and years of repressed trauma, learned how to trust humanity again, learned a whole lot about how my brain works, & how to protect myself and my big heart.

During this healing period, I became more intentional with my daily practices, cemented self-care routines in place that I had never had before when I was centering others, learned how to redefine "consistency" away from the rigidity that society says it is & embrace my feminine cyclical nature, and started pouring the love I had been taught to give away by the patriarchy back into myself. I learned how to pour from my overflow, and not as if my life depended on it as most women are conditioned.

I learned that my detail oriented nature of being thankful for the smallest of things was necessary for survival, & that putting intention into even the most unsuspecting everyday things can help you navigate incredible darkness. That creating small self-care rituals can remind you of your inherent worthiness, and that our mind and senses are incredibly powerful when we truly tap in and listen. What you choose to see in yourself is what will be present—so reminding yourself every single day that you are supported, even if just by the universe itself, and refocusing on your goals regularly is paramount.

Some of the items I offer in my shop serve as visual and tactile cues—when you see or feel them, you can be reminded of the intention you’ve placed into them for yourself. Others are auditory and scent-based (aromatherapy) offerings, designed for a moment of meditation in your day to help you re-center and focus on your intentions. Lastly, some are flow/movement-based, supporting moving meditations that regulate the nervous system or simply add a little connection and fun to your day.

These daily rituals became the foundation of my healing and helped me tremendously, I hope they help you on your journey too. :)

With gratitude and hope to wiggle with you soon,
Illuma